SteaKnight: Seventeenth Knight, 11.15.2007

Whenever the Knights stray from tradition it always stirs up a well of dissent and November was no different. Our benevolent leader, HEB, started out with the good intentions of moving SteaKnight from the traditional third Thursday of the month to a new day to help accomodate the large number of Knights unable to attend on the traditional Thursday. This sparked more than a little protest but, nevertheless, the date was moved up a week to 11.8 instead of the traditional 11.15. Only HEB's stern admonishments of "Answer my damn question and stop focusing on Turbo and STB's gay antics" brought order back to the fray. When the dust settled HEB declared that the asshole loses (RMD) and the asses win (everyone else but mostely Turbo and STB for their gay antics). MPH tried to re-cloud the situation by performing the duties of an 11th hour semantics surgeon but the decision was already made...11.8 it was!

Alfred's Steak House, a San Francisco insitution since 1928, was to be the location of the November high end month. Your humble correspondent went over to ATG's house for a pre-Knight cocktail. Soon HEB came by and the trio of Knights were on their way to the restaurant. RMD, MPH, MP and Turbo had already saddled up to the bar when yours truly arrived with his companions and soon thereafter FH arrived to make the group complete.

The Knights convened at a long table and the service proved to be lackluster. As a result, the Knights ended up having plenty of time for conversation.

• MP brazenly challenged Turbo to an "email off", claiming that he was sure that he received more email in a business day than Turbo. The challenge was not immediatly accepted and Turbo ended up saying that he believed MP when he said that he received more email in a business day than he.
• RMD is happy that he has tied the knot as now he only needs to fool one girl for the rest of his life instead of a bunch of women
• Is there a SteaKnight prison...or dungeon where if you do something you could be banished to? No one seemed to know.
• HEB once again brought up the possibility of Sizzler and was promptly shot down
• The question of how to pronounce the country of "Qatar" came up. The answer turns out to be rather complicated.
• A rule apparently materialized out of the ether..."you can't screm 'scraggly' or 'wrinkly'!" We'll see if this is enforceable
• HEB continued to try to defend his "upstairs" preference but, as always, it is a very, very, (very) shaky defense
• RMD is lucky he got married; he was going broke on match.com
• You can use Theraflu as lube...as well as a "liquid panty remover"
• Desperate Housewives is unwatchable
• MPH at one point had to justify the contents of his wallet to a disbelieving crowd
• Turbo and MPH had a conversation about Lost and it was subjected to an on-the-spot vote and deemed the most boring SK conversation ever
• RMD can remember really liking Friends
• Turbo bided his time after the Sizzler discussion and finally suggested CheeseSteak for a low end visit
• RMD has a GI Joe #1 magazine format comic that has a UPC code on it instead of a Snake-Eyes logo

Throughout the course of dinner the server appeared to go into a form of temporary extinction, only to emerge after an entirely too long of an absence. Perhaps there is hope for the dodo and carrier pigeon after all. The gaps in the server's appearance were so long it would've been appropriate to reintroduce himself when he finally did reappear as I imagine that most of us had forgotten what he looked like by that point. To top off the less than mediocre service, Turbo ordered cheesecake (perhaps planting a subconscious seed with the other Knights such that CheeseSteak would remain fresh in their minds?) and received bread pudding. Lovely.

Total bill: $549.04

HEB (sixteenth Knight)

STB (fifteenth Knight)

ATG (fifteenth Knight)
RMD (fourteenth Knight)

Turbo (fourteenth Knight)
MPH (thirteenth Knight)
FH (sixth Knight)

MP (fifth Knight)