SteaKnight: Third Night
The Knights must've been in the mood to create a SteaKnight for the ages when they booked a slot at DiMaggio's Chop House, a relatively new establishment on the San Francisco restaurant
scene dedicated to the venerable Yankee Clipper as well as some well fine cuts of delicious beef. Turmoil ensued in the week leading up to this glorious high-end night as only two reservation times were available for the Knights; a 6 PM booking that was a bit early late-working Knights and an 8:45 PM booking that was late for the early rising Knights. Chaos ensued as a flurry of emails was exchanged that weighed in on the most appropriate time. 6 PM emerged victorious from the electronic melee.ATG arrived first at the establishment with HEB and your humble correspondent close on his heels. While relaxing at the bar, enjoying a few gentleman's drinks and discussing HEB's latest acquisition (62" TV), MPH, JM and RMD arrived. The group, now 6 strong, were seated.
JB was to arrive late sothe group enjoyed a few more cocktails as the jacks enjoyed the excellent service at DiMaggio's. JM, ever the Red Sox fan, couldn't help but taunt the ghost of Joltin' Joe by wearing his Big Papi jersey. He didn't end up on the bathroom floor in a bloody pulp so we'll consider it a victory of sorts for the Sox.
While waiting for JB the Knights were treated to a lovely round of limoncello to cleanse the palette. The rounds of cocktails continued and the service was so excellent that a cocktail would be finished no more than 30 seconds before the waitstaff would be by inquiring as to whether another was desired. Eventually JB arrived and was rewarded immediately with a well-earned Bloody Mary after a stressful drive up from the peninsula.
The cynosure of the pre-dinner conversation was a heated debate about inviting and adding new members. This was an extension of yet another email flurry prior to SteaKnight in which everyone seemed to be in basic agreement that we should induct new members but no one could agree on the specifics of inviting or membership.
ATG opened the salvo by suggesting that people send an email to the group 15 minutes before SteaKnight starts, which was a direct taunt to RMD who thought he might be able to slip a new friend in town into the SteaKnight roster at the last moment. RMD parried the verbal barb well and intense discussion ensued as to exactly how more members could be inducted. Foremost in the minds of many Knights was allowing the group to grow too big too quickly. However, growth and new, quality Knights also seemed important to everyone. It was easy to see that
balanced growth should be the key to any new membership policy. Accordingly, the proposition was floated that potential new members could only be invited on Low End nights. This appeared to die on the discussion floor and slowly it emerged that there would be a rotating invite list such that a Knight would have a month where he could invite someone new. If said Knight didn't have anyone to ask that month, the invite would go to the next Knight in line. It was discussed that new members must be able to show a commitment so the suggestion was discussed as to whether a potential member must attend two consecutive SteaKnights in order to have full membership privileges but this appears to also appears to have gone the way of the Spanish Armada. The formal policy has yet to be drafted, but it appears that progress has been made.During this all-consuming discussion, the chef was hard at work preparing two seafood platters of generous proportions. They arrived in grand style with smoke rolling off the plates like fog off the Bay. Each plate consisted of lobster, mussels, oysters, clams, and 4 of the largest shrimp many in attendance had seen for some time. The Knights eagerly unleashed their hunger on this bounty of the sea and soon the conversation pulled back slightly during the blissful enjoyment of the well-presented plates. It
didn't take long to resume, with RMD becoming increasingly optimistic about his virility due to his copious consumption of oysters. Other discussions revolved around JM threatening the issue of a fatwah (although it can't be recalled what for) as well as MPH's description of his efforts to evade the prying questions of his co-workers as they attempted to extract important knowledge about our quasi-secretive dining society. JM and MPH (as well as ATM who was unable to attend the evening), in an attempt to harvest the elusive arrow of Cupid, have made
a pact to approach at least one woman whenever they go to the supermarket so the Knights were able to get an update on the various successes they've experienced under this new tactic. Finally, we also had to commemorate and get the latest on a very special occasion...that being the recent engagement of RMD. Congratulations chap! He will prove to be the first married Knight barring any last minute shotgun weddings.
After devouring the seafood platters the main courses were quick to arrive. Once again, th entrees arrived simultaneously, no small feat when trying to prepare seven different entrees. It was as if the Knights were all once again children on Christmas morning or any of the eeight days of Hanukkah, a gleam in the eye emerging from every Knight to the number. RMD was so inspired by the offering that he decided to milk himself on the spot. H
EB, the founder of SteaKnight SF, simply sat stunned in awe of the prime slice of beef that lay before him. Other gasps and cries of delight were apparent in other forms and fashions as the Knights began to elegantly slice and consume their tender slices of beef bliss.Throughout the dinner the service continued to be impeccable. It was as if the lads had been transported to an entire land that's entire existence was based on enabling one to enjoy a steak-filled evening. Truly, it was a fine steak dining experience to the nth
degree. For those who don't partake of the steak experience (including your humble correspondent) a fine seafood risotto, filled with a plethora of goodies from Poseidon's realm, was the daily special of the day. It was just as well met as the hearty steaks.As dinner grew to a close the Knights lingered over the last bits of tasty delight on their plates and requested the check. Guesses flew
around the table as to the wallet damage done after this monumentally enjoyable dining experience. It turns out that the lads weren't too far off in their approximation. The final bill summed to a very respectable $556.95 without tip. The bliss on the tongue was more enduring than the fleeting
damage to the wallet and, after credit card roulette was ruled out, some of the more enterprising Knights still tried to slip in extra ways to pay including Safeway Club card and Red Sox schedule.After a minor mathematical error with the bill (that's the price paid when letting the religion teacher do the math) which was quickly corrected but would've tragically shorted our exceptional waiters, everyone left with a spring in their step after such an indulgent meal. Some of the Knights still had some space in their nigh-filled stomachs for a cup of g
elato so they adjourned to the gelato store just down the block from DiMaggio's. After having happily topped off their stomachs with genuine Italian gelato the San Francisco night owed the Knights nothing more. It seemed fitting that as the last remaining Knights strode off into the night on their way home, they passed by the impressive Saints Peter and Paul Church which was the very location that Joe DiMaggio married his first wife, starlet
Dorothy Arnold, as well as where his funeral mass was held. This was truly a SteaKnight for the ages.Alcohol consumed: Makers and Ginger (1), Anchor Steam (3), Chivas Regal (1), Ketel One w/ Club Soda and lime (2), Stella Artois (1), Zinfandel Folie a Deux (1), Pinot Noir Chalone (1), Cabernet Hess (2),
Bill: $556.95 ($656.95 with tip)
Attendees:
HEB (third Knight)
STB (third Knight)
ATG (second Knight)
JB (second Knight)
MPH (second Knight)
RMD (second Knight)
JM (first Knight)
